Friday, September 18, 2020

INDU PARMAR (1943 - 2020)

My mother, Induben Parmar, passed away on 18th September, 2020.  She had contracted COVID-19 a couple of weeks ago and had some underlying conditions as well as a pacemaker.  She had been hospitalized for over 10 days and in the last couple of days, she had been conscious but not very responsive.

Ma was born in Ahmedabad where she grew up and after getting married, spent the rest of her life in Vadodara.  She was gregarious, loving and kind-hearted.  Very welcoming by nature and a good cook, she always had wonderful meals prepared for me and many of my friends (who still remember those times).  She had a remarkable trait in dealing with adversity.  When faced with a difficult situation, she allowed herself to initially cry and grieve over it. But once she got it out of her system, we rarely saw her break down again over that.  It seems that she used that mechanism to toughen herself and was almost defiant against the adversity.  I hope some of that prevails through the rest of us in the family.

She left behind a heartbroken immediate-family: my father (her companion for over 5 decades), my older sister and me.  Her three grandsons will miss the daily exchange of WhatsApp messages. Her only sibling, an older sister, now finds herself all alone without her. The extended network of friends and family will miss having her as the constant presence in Diwalipura.

As I broke the news of her death to him, my father said through tears, "I don't know if I should be sad (that she is gone) or if I should be happy (that she is no longer in pain).  But I know I loved her a lot."  I don't think I can put it any better.  I wish that she could have been around longer but am grateful for her presence as long as it lasted.  

She is loved and missed very much.  

ॐ शान्तिः शान्तिः शान्तिः